I got chatting to a lady in the park today whilst I was holding my little one in the carrier.
When I told her he’s 8 weeks old tomorrow, she replied: “You’re looking really good for it”.
Little did she know I am also recovering from an emergency c-section.
She didn’t see the scar that still pulls, the body I don’t quite recognise, or the hormones that seem to have a mind of their own.
She didn’t see the back pain from hours of holding and feeding, the bowels that still haven’t recovered and the exhaustion. She didn’t see the sensory overwhelm, the constant hypervigilance and anxiety, or the fact that time for myself is usually only a quick shower and brushing my teeth before my baby needs me again.
She saw someone who looked well and that compliment meant the world to me.
Because early parenthood, especially when you’re neurodivergent, is tough. Your nervous system is already working overtime in a world that has suddenly become louder, needier, and far less predictable.
We carry a lot that people cannot see. A compliment, checking in or someone simply saying they’re there if you need can mean a lot.
So if you think something kind about a new parent, say it. You never quite know what they’re going through, even if they don’t say.
And new parents, take those little moments when you do receive those words or acts of kindness.
You can be exhausted and still be strong.
Today, a stranger in the park reminded me of that.
And I felt so much better.