Recently, we went to a dog show in our local park. It seems like a good idea in theory: it gets the three of us out and socialising, having a bit of harmless fun, and all in name of a good cause. In theory. Of course, theory rarely matches up to reality.
I’m hungry
First, you’ve got your food to consider. It’s always a bit of a shot in the dark as to whether they’ll have any of your safe foods., If you’ve not taken a packed lunch with you, then you’re kind of stuck. When it comes to local events, there’s not often the budget to think about anything beyond maybe a burger van. I was fine as there were sausages on the go for me, and I do love a good banger. Problem was, there weren’t any burgers.
The only other food available was a curry stall, which again was great for me, but Sonay wasn’t able to have anything with spice at the time, due to illness. The only other option was cake, which isn’t really suitable if you need something to properly fill your stomach. In the end, Sonay had to settle for a plain bread roll. Hardly a fun and interesting food for a day out.
If you’ve got to go…
Secondly, what I shall call “the facilities”. If you have sensory sensitivities based around smell, a chemical toilet is going to be nothing short of a nightmare. We both discovered this when we went to music festivals, and when we went to those, we’d keep a tub of Vicks Vaporub to rub under our nose – a sort of smelly eucalyptus moustache. It worked a treat of course, but nuked your sense of smell for hours afterwards. Never a problem for me, I love that sort of smell, but I can imagine others might not like it so much.
It goes further though – you can’t even be sure if there will be things to clean up with, like toilet roll or something to clean your hands with. You need to make sure you bring tissues and antibac gel with you. Problem is, we’re not always the best at remembering things we both need, so you can find yourself caught short.
All the people
The biggest consideration of course is crowds. A lot of AuDHD people like Sonay and I aren’t great with crowds, and whilst being local and smaller than say something like Crufts, it was still crowded and hectic, with around 300 people and 200 dogs in a small section of our local park. There was simply too much going on for us.
Luckily, we were able to go home to take a break, but I can imagine lots of other people don’t have that option. If only for ourselves, I would strongly suggest that quiet areas be something that be available for people to have a few minutes to collect themselves.
RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria)
With something like a dog show where competition is involved, you’re more likely than not to experience some rejection. Sonay certainly experienced this. Sylvie was quite overwhelmed by everything – all the dogs, people, noises, smells, everything. We entered her for four events, and she didn’t win a thing, or even get shortlisted.
As soon as we got her home, she was back to her happy smiling waggy-tailed self, but out in the showground, she was all over the place, stiff-tailed and whining. Of course, Sylvie doesn’t get RSD, and couldn’t have cared less about the competition. She’s more interested in where the next treat is coming from. For Sonay it was a reminder of all the school competitions and plays she didn’t get selected for.
Rounding up
There are lots of things to consider when it comes to days out as an AuDHD family. Some things can be considered by organisers, but it’s always best to take precautions to make sure your needs are met as best as possible.