Sonay and James met one sunny day at Glastonbury in 2015. At this point, Sonay had no idea about her ADHD and autism whilst James had been provided with a diagnosis of ‘Aspergers’ at the age of 16, but hadn’t thought much of it.
He was in IT and she was an aspiring lawyer. Neither of them knew quite how similar they were back then.
Within six months, Sonay made the move from London to York, James just travelled from Wakefield, to move in with each other. They started building a life together, slowly learning about themselves and each other on the way.
Sonay eventually convinced James to move back to London with her to pursue better career opportunities, but neurodiversity didn't really feature in their lives at this point.
Fast-forward to 2021, after they got married, Sonay started to realise she may be AuDHD after a lifetime of being told she talked too much, was oversensitive and wasn’t reaching her potential. She was eventually diagnosed with both ADHD (combined type) and autism and at the age of 32.
They both became Sonay’s special interests allowing James to start to understand more about the diagnosis he received almost 25 years ago, especially that it was no longer referred to as 'Asperger’s'.
They then began to realise that he also had traits of ADHD, after a lifetime of being told he didn’t listen, and he eventually got his diagnosis of ADHD (inattentive type) at the age of 40.
This came as no particular surprise.
Autism and ADHD was almost all James and Sonay talked about, and they decided to start a podcast to talk about their lives as a neurodivergent married couple.
At the same time, Sonay started training to become an ADHD coach after experiencing ADHD coaching for herself.
This lead them to found ‘Divergently Being’, to spread acceptance and support of neurodiversity, with a particular focus on late-diagnosed autistic and ADHD professionals.
Divergently Married, their podcast, launched their first episode, and Sonay qualified as a coach soon after.
In the middle of all of this, Sylvie joined their little family. She was very supportive of the direction they were taking, as long as play and cuddles were involved.