I read a piece recently about motherhood and ADHD.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It talked about how hard the author found it to enjoy the mundane parts of being a mum. The repetition. The routine. The baby classes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And I get that. Ish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Because on paper, motherhood involves a lot of the things ADHD brains are supposed to struggle with. Repetitive tasks. No clear finish line. Constant interruptions. Very little control. A lot of sensory input.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But for me, it has been the complete opposite.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Right now, I feel demotivated by basically everything apart from being Mum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And I think that is worth saying too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There is so much pressure after having a baby to get back to yourself. Back to work. Back to earning. Back to ambition. Back to being productive. Back to your body. Back to whatever version of yourself existed before.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But what if you do not want to go back in quite the same way?
What if your priorities have genuinely changed?
What if you are not less ambitious, but the thing that feels most important has shifted?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Before becoming a mum, I was always chasing the next thing. The next idea, the next client, the next plan. My husband and I joked that we’d have at least one major life change a year since we met.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A lot of my life has been powered by ADHD momentum. Interest, urgency, emotion, proving myself, trying to make something work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But since having my little one so much of that has gone quiet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And no, it is not because motherhood is easy or calm or magically fulfilling every second of the day. It is not. It is exhausting. It is overstimulating. It is relentless. It is trying to keep a tiny human alive while sleep deprived, covered in dribble, sick or wee and wondering whether you have remembered to eat or drink enough water.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But it is also him.
Another feed is not just another feed.
Another nappy is not just another nappy.
Another nap attempt is not just another nap attempt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It is learning him. Knowing his cues. Watching him change. Seeing him smile when he sees me. Being the person he reaches for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It is repetitive, yes.
But it is not empty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And I think that is the difference. When you look at motherhood, a lot of what ADHDers find interesting are there – connection, novelty, positive interests, strengths, challenge and urgency. So maybe not being bored by motherhood but demotivated by everything that pulls me away from being mum, is also normal when you have ADHD.
For some weeks I have beating myself up about it. Trying to find a cause. Is it depression? Have I lost myself?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe I have not lost myself.
Maybe I am just meeting a new version of myself.
A version who does not want to run on stress, proving, overworking and constant output.
A version who is allowed to be absorbed by motherhood for a while.
A version who might come back to other ambitions later, but does not have to force it before she is ready.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Some ADHD mums find the mundane parts of parenting painfully difficult. That is real.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Some ADHD mums need work, stimulation, adult conversation and space away from the baby to feel like themselves. That is real too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And some of us might find that, the baby is the most motivating thing in the room.
That is also real.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
One ADHD mum might find an hour of baby music boring but for me seeing my little one’s face light up when ‘Say Hello To The Sun’ comes on will never get boring.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There is no one correct neurodivergent motherhood story.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So if everything apart from your baby feels dull, distant or impossible to care about right now, maybe you are not broken.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe you are not wasting your potential.
Maybe your brain and body know where your attention needs to be.
And maybe that is OK.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Since becoming a mum, I\u2019ve found something I did not quite expect. It is not motherhood that feels boring or under-stimulating to my ADHD brain. It is almost everything else. This post is about what happens when your priorities shift, your motivation changes shape, and being a mum becomes the thing that feels most meaningful right now.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":97,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-83","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-divergently-parenting"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=83"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":122,"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/83\/revisions\/122"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/97"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=83"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=83"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.divergentlybeing.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=83"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}